Delayed reaction

image may be subject to copyright


Rosie’s school sports day. Our great leader David Cameron makes a brief appearance on the school playing fields. He’s there because his government has just released its plans for a new curriculum that will teach fractions and basic computer programming to 5-year-olds… from September 2014. Much as I have a deep dislike for Michael Gove, the human worm and current education secretary, I’m not entirely dismissive of his proposed changes to the national curriculum. I find something reassuring in the focus on maths and science. (I’ve only had the briefest of glances at the proposals, so I may yet change my mind.)

Oh yes, this is also the day when I finally – after two years of waiting – receive notice from my employers. Stapled to the generic letter (in which I am thanked for my “contribution to the organisation”) is a redundancy quote – an estimate of how much money I would get if I am not successfully re-deployed into a new post. It isn’t enough to tempt me.


I actually realise I have been made redundant. My letter is still in my bag, wedged somewhere between my chequebook, a children’s book that has been there since Saturday, and a clementine. I have not re-read it, nor do I intend to. My choices remain as they were. I am waiting to see which posts I will be skills matched into. All going well, I will have to endure two interviews at the end of the month. I’ve done no prep for them. I’m in a state of delusion. As long as I don’t think about it, it won’t happen. Nevertheless, I dutifully print out any and all information that might aid my chances, file them in the appropriate folder, and leave it untouched on my desk. I continue to deliberate the choices available to me, one of which could see me moving countries within the next two months.

I keep deliberating these options as if they were mine to choose. Omnipotence borne of hope… and delusion.



5 thoughts on “Delayed reaction

  1. I think anyone in your situation would be doing the same thing- deliberating. This must be tremendously stressful yet I hope you can somehow find a sense of calm in the eye of the storm. God closes one door but opens another. Perhaps your next career move will be a better fit, more fulfilling. I’m praying for you…Joanne

  2. You are such a great writer… maybe some day you can write books. Be it children’s books, e-books, ‘how to cope with alcoholism’ books… It could become a new, more rewarding job for you eventually!

    • Aw, thanks Cakes. I did write a novel a long time ago, and have published short stories over the years, but since this blog is anonymous and I keep that side of me separate from this, I can’t tell you anything about it. :-o. The perils of anonymous blogging. *sigh*

  3. Pingback: command-option-escape | married to an alcoholic

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s